‘The internal vessel’ - 17th June 2020

Fear - the shadow work

Leftover feeling, on the bottom of the vessel, buried so deep that you completely forgot about it. Though, there is a beep ring attached to it.

Our feeling and emotion are like a compass where we are directed to. Though our logical side of mind also holds our outer frame of the structure, our belief, longer perspectives to accomplish our desired state.

What is happening is that we tend to devalue our emotions which signal our desire `happiness’ by burying ourselves with daily little missions. We do unconsciously.

Take care of yourself, take care of your kindness.

A workshop `Time capsule` project is OPEN now!

If you are interested in, please check out the page `Time Capsule` 

I would love to get to know you a bit better, and explore your dreamscape!

‘Let it flow for its own path’ - 15th June 2020

The first year of me living in London, I was only 21 years olds, and simply excited about living in the unknown city, everything was so new to me, and I let myself explore whatever it interests me. I was very young and rather big-headed, means, I truly believed that anything was possible because I came this far, on the other side of the planet from my hometown. So in the first year, my favorite thing to do was, randomly walking on the street days and nights, doing sketches, taking photographs, even stalking if some peculiar people got the attention from me. Soon after I did these regular random walks, I started to notice some familiar faces on the streets. There were homeless people who seemed to have their positions in particular ways. I had so many questions that I wanted to ask as it was a mystery to me how they ended up being there, etc. I wanted to hear their life stories. ( From this street research, I found out that some of them were earning very well by being homeless more than my weekly wage of being a waitress at the time!)

One day I decided to step forward. There was an early middle-aged guy who was sitting on the corner of the crowded popular touristic square. I have been observing him sitting there every day for a couple of months by then. He was sitting there without moving much, not even asking for any changes, simply staring straight for a real long time. He had such clear eyes, that you could tell that there is something smart about him. So I asked.

‘Why don’t you ask for a change if you are sitting there all day and doing nothing?’

‘I am training my eyes. You would see, only from this position that you could see something so real.’

He was a well-off banker, even was on the managing position till being laid off. He told me that he was manipulated by some colleagues, who he trusted in by working together for years and years. 

`Look carefully how people would look at me, or ignore me by sitting here in this position.’  He said.

‘There are so many different people with cultural diversity here. But you see, what they appeared to be don’t fit any longer with who they really are from this position.’

What shocked him was not about losing a job or not even toward colleagues. He said he wanted to overcome the feeling of doubt that he started to have for his own eyes.

During our conversation, there were people who came to him, asking if he wanted to eat some snacks from the nearby restaurant. I could guess that they are working in the restaurant that they know how he is sitting here every day, so they show caring in their own manners. Meanwhile, there are people, well-dressed, seem-to be well educated but they are so into their conversation with each other that they almost crashed into the homeless guy as if he doesn’t exist.

It was like a children’s story, ‘The frog king’.

A workshop `Time capsule` project is OPEN now!

If you are interested in, please check out the page `Time Capsule` 

I would love to get to know you a bit better, and explore your dreamscape!

‘The spring yellow slowly showed up’ - 15th June 2020

‘The safety net always waits at the back’ - 8th June 2020

You would never know how your personal stories might encourage, inspire, and support others in the future. Even the most painful memory of yours, one day it would transform to become simply one of your life experiences. By then, you would see the memory as if you are listening to somebody else’s story as an observer. As if peeling off one layer of an onion, even unpleasant seem-to-be negative experience that you wish you would not have had in your life, it would not define you as who you are. Certainly, there are elements that made you stronger through your personal experiences, unless you are repeating similar patterns for doing things in certain ways.

Creative writing would be helpful. A personal diary for whatever you have in your mind. Write it down. Understanding what is happening in your mind, the key to this is, to be brutally honest with yourself. Nobody would see you when you are writing at your comfy home. Don`t be a ‘nice’ girl/woman/man/boy. Scribble down as quick as possible, before the sensible logical side of your mind would hit in. It won’t matter that even you don’t understand yourself for what you are trying to say. Imagine, as if you are simply trying to take off unnecessary verbal trash out of your head. Do not even judge for whatever you wrote. 

Let it all flow. As if you are playing a musical instrument. Your writing might get so emotional that it won’t be decipherable. It is good. Take off all the emotions along. You might feel pain by writing it, you might feel like a sudden urge of crying as well as smiling. All are pretty normal in the process. Let it all flow. Keep writing, even that would make you feel uncomfortable for what you are writing, since sometimes,  until we really take this action of writing, until we manifest our thought externally by writing on one piece of paper, we don’t even know what has been storing in our minds. That would happen.

The oddest thing is that, after doing this repeatedly for a while as a daily routine, you will have a day when things change in a way, something clicks, or you kind of feel that you managed to snap out of `one perception`, `one way of approaching things`, or simply it was ‘ a drama’ that you were not in from the first place. 

A workshop `Time capsule` project is OPEN now!

If you are interested in, please check out the page `Time Capsule` 

I would love to get to know you a bit better, and explore your dreamscape!

‘Trying to get freedom out of’ - 8th June 2020